#siblings #brothersandsisters #jacob #rachelandleah #leahandrachel #leah #rachel #breisheet #parshatvayeitzei #vayeitzei #lavan #siblingrelationships #families
The book of Genesis is filled with stories of siblings. From Cain and Abel, through Isaac and Yishmael, Jacob and Esau, we see one dysfunctional family situation after another. Perhaps the Torah's message is theological; that God has a plan and we fit not so neatly into that plan or perhaps the Torah is asking us to expect the realistic outcomes of our lives; that we are human and flawed and our relationships, in turn, will be flawed. Maybe we are being asked to do better than the Avot and Imahot. It is hard to know.
Parshat Vayeitzei differs from other stories in Genesis in that it deals with the relationship of sisters. Rachel and Leah are introduced to us in this parsha. Their father, Lavan, perhaps an unscrupulous character, marries the sisters off to the same man which complicates the already complicated life of siblings.
For the next few moments I would like to examine the complicated world of siblings. For those of you reading this post, who have siblings, perhaps you will recognize yourselves in this series of poems. Whether relationships with siblings are healthily maintained or break over time, for some magical time in our lives, our siblings were everything to us as we created worlds together.
Leann
Siblings
One
To be a sibling
is to share a catalog
of memories.
Sibs are your other half,
or third
or
quarter;
without them you are minimized;
a tiny file
in the corner of the monitor.
With them you are
the complete set,
the encyclopedia of Us-ness
the dictionary of We-ness
and the Complete Reference Guide
to the Musketeer Universe.
******
Two
Not to over romanticize
Siblings,
are
a cup of
deep
red wine
overflowing
with shared experiences.
Shades of
cinnamon and cloves
lemon and honey.
Not to over romanticize
Sometimes with
Siblings the cup overflows.
Out pours vinegar,
sour smelling
and biting.
Resentment boils over.
Stains of envy
never wash out.
******
Three
Siblings are wallpaper
strippers.
peeling away
the layers of paper
we‘ve added over the years.
the bold stripes
peeled off
reveal
the colors of life’s stages
ripped from the walls
gleefully;
leaving us as we were
skinny,
scabby kneed,
mosquito bitten,
kids in baggy socks
looking for attention.
*****
Four
Siblings
can walk away forever
leaving a ragged cut
in
cracked sepia family photos.
Historical markers
that appear so happy.
Forced smiles
in portraits
disguise what lies beneath;
mistakes that cannot
be
papered over.
******
Five
siblings,
no matter the age
remain fuzzy
young pups
warmed by each other,
yet blind;
still
competing
to find the warmest space
close to their mom.
***** Six
Siblings are home,
whatever home might mean.
No matter where you are
or what your age
or your station in life;
when you are with your siblings
you are home.
****
Seven
Once
I had a sister.
It was a lifetime ago.
I remember her brown hair,
her sharp eyes
her laugh.
Old songs she sang.
And then life interrupted
and we became sisters
in name alone.
Sisters
whose history
remains
a mere trickle
of a teardrop.
Salt leaving
white rivulets
on cheeks
growing wrinkled
with age.
Now Laban had two daughters; the name of the older one was Leah, and the name of the younger was Rachel.
Leah had weak eyes; Rachel was shapely and beautiful.
Genesis 29:16-17 Translation from Sefaria
וּלְלָבָ֖ן שְׁתֵּ֣י בָנ֑וֹת שֵׁ֤ם הַגְּדֹלָה֙ לֵאָ֔ה וְשֵׁ֥ם הַקְּטַנָּ֖ה רָחֵֽל׃
וְעֵינֵ֥י לֵאָ֖ה רַכּ֑וֹת וְרָחֵל֙ הָֽיְתָ֔ה יְפַת־תֹּ֖אַר וִיפַ֥ת מַרְאֶֽה׃
When morning came, there was Leah! So he said to Laban, “What is this you have done to me? I was in your service for Rachel! Why did you deceive me?”
Laban said, “It is not the practice in our place to marry off the younger before the older.
Genesis 29:25-26 Translation from Sefaria
For inspiration and learning this week I listed to Matan's One on One podcast with Dr. Yael Ziegler.
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